Accountability software can be helpful, but I want to be clear up front: it should be a short‑term tool—guardrails to help us while we learn to grow in holiness—not a long‑term replacement for a biblical, Spirit‑led life. I walk you through what accountability software actually does, the common pitfalls (it can become a crutch, create hypervigilance, and even distort our identity in Christ), and a long‑term view grounded in Galatians 5 and Romans 6 that calls us into freedom and fruit of the Spirit.
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iHeartRadio SUMMARY/INTRO:
Accountability software can be helpful, but I want to be clear up front: it should be a short‑term tool—guardrails to help us while we learn to grow in holiness—not a long‑term replacement for a biblical, Spirit‑led life. I walk you through what accountability software actually does, the common pitfalls (it can become a crutch, create hypervigilance, and even distort our identity in Christ), and a long‑term view grounded in Galatians 5 and Romans 6 that calls us into freedom and fruit of the Spirit.
I’ll be honest—I’m an affiliate partner with Covenant Eyes, but I’m not getting paid to make this episode; I’m sharing what I’ve wrestled with personally and with other men. I use the crutch analogy to show why relying on software forever can atrophy our spiritual muscles, and I pull us back to the hard but joyful work of choosing Christ, nailing the passions of the flesh to his cross. If you’ve ever found yourself “white‑knuckling” not to sin or wondering why others see victory you don’t, we talk through practical questions to change our thinking from mere avoidance to loving obedience. Listen with me as we move from fear and barriers into the freedom Christ died to give, and consider what small steps you can take today to grow in love for him.
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SHOW NOTES:
Is accountability software actually helping us overcome sin—or can it become a crutch?
In this episode of The Prodigal Journey, Ben takes a closer look at accountability software and how Christians should think about its role in the fight against sin. While tools that monitor online activity and report it to an accountability partner can provide helpful boundaries and guardrails, Ben argues that they were never meant to replace genuine spiritual growth.
Drawing from Galatians 5 and Romans 6, Ben explores the difference between simply trying not to sin and learning to live in the freedom Christ has given us. He compares accountability software to a crutch: something that can be useful while we’re healing, but potentially harmful if we become dependent on it indefinitely.
Ben also shares from his own experience of struggling with habitual sin and wanting God to simply take the temptation away rather than having to choose to give it up. He explains how his understanding of God, holiness, sacrifice, and spiritual growth began to change.
Ultimately, the goal isn’t to build enough barriers around ourselves to prevent sin. It’s to grow in holiness, love Christ more, live by the Spirit, and increasingly desire the things of God.
If you’ve used accountability software, struggled with habitual sin, or found yourself “white-knuckling” your way through temptation, this episode offers a different way to think about Christian freedom and spiritual growth.
TAKEAWAYS:
- Accountability software can be a helpful short-term tool for establishing healthy guardrails.
- Accountability software shouldn’t become a long-term substitute for spiritual growth and a biblical understanding of holiness.
- External boundaries cannot give us the power to obey; genuine change involves the work of the Holy Spirit and our willingness to grow.
- The Christian life isn’t ultimately about building more barriers to keep ourselves from sinning.
- We can become so focused on not sinning that sin remains the primary focus of our attention.
- Spiritual growth involves learning to put off sinful desires and put on the fruit of the Spirit.
- Ben shares how he had to recognize that he wanted God to remove his temptation rather than choosing to surrender it.
- Christian freedom means moving from fear and “white-knuckling” toward love for Christ and a desire for holiness.
- Our obedience should increasingly be motivated by love for Christ rather than fear or shame.
- Small changes in how we think can help us move toward long-term spiritual growth.
REFLECTION & APPLICATION:
- Am I viewing my struggle with sin through the freedom God wants for me, or am I “white-knuckling” my way through it?
- Is my obedience motivated more by love for Christ or by fear and shame?
- What is one small step I can take today to change the way I think about this struggle?
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CHAPTERS:
00:00 — What Is Accountability Software?
01:48 — What Accountability Software Can and Can’t Do
04:30 — Why Accountability Tools Shouldn’t Become a Crutch
06:08 — From “Not Sinning” to Growing in Holiness
07:48 — Choosing Freedom, Love & Spiritual Growth
10:50 — Boundaries, Obedience & Love for Christ
11:59 — Questions for Moving Forward
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00:00 - What Is Accountability Software?
01:48 - What Accountability Software Can and Can’t Do
04:30 - Why Accountability Tools Shouldn’t Become a Crutch
06:08 - From “Not Sinning” to Growing in Holiness
07:48 - Choosing Freedom, Love & Spiritual Growth
10:50 - Boundaries, Obedience & Love for Christ
11:59 - Questions for Moving Forward
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Foreign.
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Welcome to the Prodigal Journey, where we celebrate Christ's power through our weakness.
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And thank you for joining us on this episode.
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All right, welcome to another episode of the Prodigal Journey.
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This is your host, Ben.
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On this episode, I really want to talk about accountability software.
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I've been talking to a few different people about this topic lately, so I wanted to just take some time to share my thoughts on accountability software because there can be some confusion sometimes about what its function is and just how we should view it as believers.
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But I do want to make a disclosure.
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I am an affiliate partner with Covenant Eyes and they are an accountability software program, but I'm not getting paid for this review or this topic to talk about it.
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So I just wanted to put that out there.
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Even though I am an affiliate partner, I'm making this episode, not getting anything from it and just wanted to share my thoughts because it's been a conversation I've had lately with a bunch of different men.
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And maybe you're listening and you realize that you're just not at a place in your life where you need accountability software.
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But I just want to let you know that the truths and applications that I'm going to talk about can be applied to really any area of your spiritual life, no matter what your sin struggle may be be.
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So just make sure you listen.
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Even if this area has not been a sin struggle for you, it could also help you when you interact with others who might be struggling through maybe porn or their thought life.
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So there's that aspect as well.
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Even though you might not be struggling with it, this episode could be helpful as you interact with others who might have this struggle.
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All right, first I want to look at some scripture that I'm going to be applying to this.
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And I want to look at Galatians 5 specifically today.
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Galatians 5, verse 1 says, so Christ has truly set us free.
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Now make sure that you stay free and don't get tied up again in slavery to the law.
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Now the CSB version translation says, for freedom Christ set us free.
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Stand firm then, and don't submit again to a yoke of slavery.
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And then jumping down to verse six, I'm not going to read the whole chapter.
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I just want to highlight the verses that are applicable in this chapter to what we're going to talk about.
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But verse 6 says, for when we place our faith in Christ Jesus, there is no benefit in being circumcised or uncircumcised.
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What is important is faith expressing itself in love.
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And then Jumping down to verse 16, it says, so I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives.
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Then you won't be doing what your sin nature craves.
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Verse 17 the sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants.
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And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires.
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These two forces are constantly fighting each other.
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So you are not free to carry out your good intentions.
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Verse 18.
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But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.
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And then if we jump down to the end of the chapter, verse 24, those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there.
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Now I just want to talk through a couple things in this shorter episode and just help us realize our need to change the way we view accountability software.
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So first I just want to quickly talk about what is accountability software.
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And then I want to address some of the challenges we can face with accountability software.
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And then I kind of want to close out by looking at a long term view on how we should view it in our Christian life and applying it, the use of this accountability software.
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So first let's look at what is accountability software in a nutshell.
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It's basically meant to just track your online viewing history and send a report to some type of accountability partner, whoever that might be for you.
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And so the fact that someone will see what you're viewing or trying to view is meant to create some type of accountability and honesty to try and prevent us from viewing inappropriate sites.
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So that's basically what this software is meant to do.
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Now, what are some of the challenges that we face with accountability software?
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And this is something I notice a lot in talking to it with other men, but I believe it should only be viewed as a short term tool just to help us establish some healthy guardrails as we work at gaining a better understanding of what God says in His Word about lust, holiness and and et cetera connected to this topic.
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We can't view it as a long term replacement for a healthy biblical understanding of holiness, because when we view this as a long term replacement for that, it really can create a crutch that can damage us long term.
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It can damage our understanding of who God says we are, our identity in Christ.
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It also can create a hypervigilance and over time it just starts to draw our focus to the wrong things.
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Let me give you this example.
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If you were to break your leg or do something to your leg that required you to use a crutch.
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You would use the crutch only for the purpose of the healing.
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But over time, as that leg heals, you have to start putting pressure and weight on the leg to help it stay healthy and strong.
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And if your leg heals but you continue to use that crutch your whole life, eventually.
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I'm not a doctor, but from what I understand in looking at this, your leg muscles might eventually atrophy and create other problems from not using the leg, and it could cause other long term damage to the leg.
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So that's just an example to think about when comparing it to the long term view of accountability software.
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So what is the long term view?
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And this is the important thing that I've really learned over the last couple years as I've thought about this idea of accountability software differently.
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And really the long term view here is important.
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I heard one guy say one time about this issue, the purpose of the Christian life is not to not sin.
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It's not about putting more and more barriers around our life to keep us from sinning when we want to sin.
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And I think that's such a perfect way to frame this long term view.
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Because God really calls us to something greater, as we were looking at in Galatians 5, he calls us to a freedom that we can experience if we are always relying on accountability software to do the hard work for us.
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And when it comes down to it, there are ways around accountability software.
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So it really leaves us asking the question of do we want to grow and put off the desires of the flesh?
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Because these tools will not do it for us.
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We have to want to grow and put off those desires of the old flesh.
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If we spend all our time thinking about not sinning, we're still thinking about sinning.
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Maybe you've heard the example before.
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If I keep telling you not to think about a pink elephant, the more and more I say that, that pink elephant is still going to be in your mind.
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So I think that's important because as we grow in holiness and our love for God, we should want to put off the desires of the flesh.
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And here's a personal example from my own life where this was used to really be an intense struggle for me, in the sense that I used to always wonder why other people were seeing victory in their lives over sin.
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Yet I was still giving into these habitual sins.
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And I kept praying for God to take away my struggle and to give me victory.
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But then I would fail again and think that I was somehow different than all Those other people, I thought that I was somehow doomed to just forever have this habitual sin.
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But my understanding of God was all wrong.
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I didn't understand that love requires sacrifice, just like a relationship.
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So I finally came to realize that I wanted so desperately for God to take away that temptation and sin because when it really came down to the nitty gritty of it, I wanted it to be taken away from me instead of me having to make the choice to give it up.
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And I think that's so important for us to think about.
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He won't take away those desires because then he would be taking away our ability to choose to not sin.
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He would be taking away our ability to choose to love him and our ability to choose to live in the Spirit.
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And I think that's an important difference for us to think about.
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In Romans 6, verse 14, it says, Sin is no longer your master, for you no longer live under the requirements of the law.
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Instead you live under the freedom of God's grace.
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So I think that's important in thinking about the long term view of accountability software.
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It's good for the temporary while we are learning to put off the desires of the flesh and learning to put on the fruit of the spirit.
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So I think that's an important way to look at it because we're shifting our view from looking at accountability software as trying to not sin and refocusing our lives around the idea that God wants us to grow in holiness.
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He wants us to grow in our love for him, and he wants us to choose him in the relationship and not these other sins, choosing them above Him.
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So as we think through this just in conclusion, I do want to recognize that there are different nuances to this discussion and everyone might not land on the same conclusions.
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And some of these we could go in greater depth to.
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But I just wanted to shortly address this in an episode, just taking a big picture view of accountability software and even other sin struggles in our lives.
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And these are things I've been thinking through in my own life.
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And I feel like it has drastically helped change my perspective and my spiritual growth because I have shifted away from those viewpoints, focusing more on the holiness of God and what he wants for us in our lives.
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So as we think about applying this to our own lives, two things I just want to close with.
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And then a couple questions.
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Boundaries and guardrails are good, but they don't give us the power to obey them or keep them.
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And they don't give us the power to love Christ more.
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Again, going back to that personal example I shared with you, I wanted it so badly to be taken away from me because I did not want to have to make the choice to give it up.
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And I didn't love God enough to give those things up and live in the freedom that he had saved me to live in.
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And I think we often, we so often miss that and we feel like we are cursed to be stuck in these habitual sins when sometimes it's the fact that we just don't want to give them up because we love them more than we love God.
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And then the other thing as well is that true love costs something, just like in a relationship, as I said before.
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And our love must fuel our acts of devotion.
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So it does come down to sometimes asking the question, do I love God more than I love this sin?
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Couple questions to think about in closing.
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Are you viewing your sin in light of the freedom that God wants for you?
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Maybe you've had that same struggle I had of seeing other people get victory in their lives over sin.
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And maybe you're stuck in that same pattern.
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And so I just want to ask you, are you viewing your sin in light of the freedom that God wants and has for you as a believer or are you just you find yourself white knuckling it and only thinking about not sinning?
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Question number two.
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Is your obedience motivated by love for Christ or is it motivated by fear, shame, or something else?
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Now a lot of these are connected to our identity and who we see ourselves as.
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Do we see ourselves as people saved by God, loved by God, created for goodness?
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And the third question I have for you is what small steps can you take today to change your thinking?
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We do need to think long term view in our preparation and growing in holiness.
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But sometimes we look so far out that we miss what's right in front of us and how we can change things in front of us today.
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So what small steps can you take today to change your thinking?
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To change your thinking from not sinning to growing in love for Christ and holiness.
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I hope that this episode can help you in thinking about how to move forward in your Christian walk and how to move from living in fear to living in the freedom that Christ has saved us for.
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And I know we don't all land on the same spot on this, but I hope it's encouraging to you that you can help see some of that shift in thinking to focusing more on God's holiness, growing in holiness in our Christian walk and our love for God and growing in the fruit of the Spirit, because that's important.
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And that shift in thinking can really help us get the victory that we need and that God has made available to us.
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Because in Galatians five at the end of the chapter, there we see those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there.
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There's a responsibility on our part.
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There is action that we have to take on our part to nail those passions and desires of the sinful nature to his cross.
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That's on us to love him more than those things and to give those things up because our love for him is so great.
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If you want to reach out, you can reach out to me and share maybe how this was helpful, you and your thinking process.
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Or if it's been a struggle for you and you need some prayer, you can reach out as well and look forward to seeing you next time on the next episode.
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Thanks for tuning in to the Prodigal Journey, where we celebrate Christ's power through our weakness.
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This podcast is available on all major platforms, so be sure you go and subscribe or leave us a review.
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Also, if you'd like to reach out, you can reach me Ben at the prodigal journey.com that's ben@theprodigaljourney.com tune in next time to the Prodigal Journey.
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Sam.
